[ack] Linking Your $#!+

[Cascadians]

The ultimate Invasion of Privacy!

How long before this is required?

Imagine the hacking ...
Like Stu re-routing the info on Dennis' turds to this Forum, LOL !!!

Too much, folks, too much ...

[ Fair Use: For Educational / Research / Discussion Purposes Only ]
http://news.bbc.co.uk/hi/english/health/newsid_1433000/1433904.stm
Wednesday, 11 July, 2001, 14:55 GMT 15:55 UK

The new VIP will check for health problems

Stay healthy with the toilet 'doctor'

A company in Cheshire is designing a futuristic toilet which can monitor human waste and spot health problems.

At the first sign of a medical condition, the Versatile Interactive Pan (VIP) would contact a GP via the internet.

The VIP concept has been produced by the bathroom manufacturers Twyford.

With a voice-activated seat, automatic flush and the ability to detect health problems, the company says it is a "major breakthrough" in toilet technology.

Terry Wooliscroft, Twyford Although the model is not yet in production, Twyford predicts it could be on the market within the next five years.

Spokesman Terry Wooliscroft said: "This is a major breakthrough for us.

"Toilets haven't changed much since the concept was developed by Thomas Twyford 120 years ago.

"We want to change all that and see what a toilet can do if you introduce modern technology to it."

Urine and stool samples would be examined by the toilet, not only for health problems but for dietary content.

Mr Wooliscroft went on: "We also want to link to the local supermarket.

"If, for example, a person is short on roughage one day, an order of beans or pulses will be sent from the VIP to the supermarket and delivered that same day."

He said it would not be long before the VIP would be ready for production.

"The technology is not too far away and we are working towards that."

Twyford's designers have already produced a model of the VIP.

It has been donated to the Gladstone Pottery Museum in Stoke-on-Trent and will feature in an exhibition in the museum's new galleries which open in the autumn.

[ 07-11-2001: Message edited by: Ashton & Leska ]

 

[mutter]

ROTFLMBO!.....[hey, can they check my bu** too?*! eek!]

so they are going to check out everyones poo-poo?....what a SHI*@Y job!

[hmmmm, looking for work, wonder what they pay?]

if they even 'try' to check my poo-poo, i`ll kick the the 'CRAP' outta them!....LOL

yea, you heard me! i`m not taking this SH*# anymore!!!! hehehehe

P*SS on it!!.......LOLLOLLOL

and fwiw....no, my SH*# 'doesn`t' stink! ROFL

[well, the fun is just endless on this one, eh? thanks A&L......i think!? ]

 

[Cascadians]

heeheeheheheheheh, mutter,
"Progress"
makes Nurse Rachet with the glove look positively quaint ...

Have you deposited your Linked anal.n.piss today?

Get moving!

 

[Just in Time]

My Dad use to say, "Progress is wonderful, we use to eat in the house and s... outside. Now we s... in the house and eat outside."

 

[Senses On]

And the central computer will determine what you need for roughage; how soon you have to report to the public health control officers for your antibiotic; when to report to the county farm for a self-medication punishment term; when you have to visit AA, etc., etc., etc.

Just think if Mrs. McGuckin had had one of these. The kids would have been taken years ago.

 

[Donald Shimoda]

The general population won't sit still for this.



I mean, they don't give a $h!t now about such stuff, so why should they in a few years?



This certainly could represent the end of the medical industry...



Seriously, I don't think so. This is JUST too invasive, folks won't go for it, and the cost will be prohibitive.

Plus, for this to work properly, guests couldn't use your WC; unless of course, everyone had a chip implanted in their rears to identify themselves to Doctor Crapper(tm).


How anal retentive...



[ 07-11-2001: Message edited by: Donald Shimoda ]

 

[Donald Shimoda]

Then again...

I just had a thought.

Institutions(gub'mint, large corps 'n' incs) will LOVE this thing.

Imagine...

You're employee badge lets you into and out of the washroom, and the stalls themselves. In this fashion, you're health can be monitored by your employer.

Every day.

Multiple times.

Like to honk on blunts once every two months or so? Too bad; you may not show up on random UIs now, but you'll get caught by this thing.

Oh, you're taking:

High blood pressure meds
Protease inhibitors
SSRIs
Or perish the thought, Viagra

Or some sort of illness/condition is discovered. Hell, you're discovered to be pregnant!

Well, sirs and madames, you're just too costly to have on OUR insurance. Get the hell outta our company; we've got to keep those profits up, Up, UP!

Oh, and if we did discover something, we're under no obligation to share this information with you. Who gives a rat's ass if you've got lymphatic cancer? We sure as hell don't, and besides, it's none of your business; after all, we paid for the Dr. Crappers(tm), so any information we get from them is ours to keep. You want some sort of medical diagnosis, go to your doctor, and you pay for it.

Oh, guess that'll be kinda hard to do, now that you've got no job and no income...

Hmm...why don't you just go die? Do the world a favor with your sickly, imperfect carcass, and go have it cremated.

Sieg Heil.

[ 07-12-2001: Message edited by: Donald Shimoda ]

 

[bigwavedave]

they already control flush volume. i tell ya, this thing is on the move!

 

[city]

LOL!!

 

[Oilpatch Hand]

So this newfangled toilet will call the doctor and order groceries for you.

The world has reached a sad state indeed when the plumbing fixture is acutally more intelligent than the human sitting on it.